God Cures Horny Woman's Asthma
Sometimes I have to wonder what century we're living in.
Here's 
a snippet of yesterday's CBS News Sunday Morning interview with Pat Robertson:
Robertson: And I said, "Tell me about your problem." And she said, "I've got this asthma." And I said, "Have you been to the (LAUGHTER) doctor?" And-- and she said, "Yes. The doctor said my asthma was caused by praying with nuns."
...
"A doctor told you this?" (UNINTEL) said, "Yes, that's what my doctor told me." And I says, "There is no way that praying with nuns is gonna cause you-- asthma." And then I prayed. And I said, "Lord, what's wrong with her?" I just prayed silently. And the Lord said, "Ask about her sex life." And--
CBS: The-- the Lord said that to you?
Robertson: Yes, He said that to me.
How's that? God wants to hear about the woman's sex life? What, maybe heaven blocks out Internet porn sites?
Anyway, long story shorter — The woman said she doesn't "have any sex life." Seems her husband was impotent, and she blamed herself for it:
Robertson: "You think it's your fault." And she said, "Yes. It's-- I think it's my fault." And I said, "Well it isn't your fault. And it may be that he's working too hard. He may be having a physical impairment. But-- there's something in his life, that this isn't your fault." And she said, "It's not?"
I said, "Absolutely not." And I said, "Okay, now let's pray for your asthma. And she said, "Okay." And we prayed. And God healed her asthma just like that.
Just like that.
But if God was really on top of his game that day, wouldn't he have gone for the two-fer — curing the husband of his impotence and letting the asthma take care of itself?
By the way, ever wonder what God's sex life is like?
Comments
If God were really on top of his game, he would have done something about Robertson's dementia. I really think the man's mental capacity is failing, and these references to sex prove it in my opinion.
Seriously. In some people, dementia affects an area of the brain that controls sexual desire, etc. Visit any nursing home or Alzheimer's daycare center and you'll hear some pretty ribald comments coming out of the mouths of sweet, little old ladies and witness some inappropriate touching from little old men!
Posted by: Kathy | April 11, 2006 09:15 AM
Kathy, you could be right about Robertson. Something's not right with the man.
Also, thanks for giving me something to look forward to in my old age ;-)
Posted by: abi | April 11, 2006 06:28 PM
Yeah, geez, you really got to wonder about God's sex life, especially when he's asking Pat Robertson about the sex life of asthmatics...geez, doesn't God watch Oprah? I think she covers all that stuff, doesn't she?
Posted by: Neil Shakespeare | April 11, 2006 10:19 PM
Oh come on! Don't begrudge god a little bit of vicarious dirty talk!!!!
Thats funny though- he's something. Sorry I haven't gotten over here lately, it gets hard to keep up with people as there are so many great bloggers with important things to say. ANd I am at Blue Republic now- and the forums are really much easier for me to contend with as opposed to surfing around, missing responses or the contributions of others, etc. They are pretty funny over there, not serious because lately I think my brain will burst!!!!
Posted by: Elizabeth Branford (lily) | April 11, 2006 11:48 PM
Doesn't God watch Oprah?
Neil, I thought Oprah was God.
Lily, I hope you'll still come and visit now that you've made it to the big time. ;-)
Posted by: abi | April 12, 2006 07:25 PM
I've managed to save up roughly $66048 in my bank account, but I'm not sure if I should buy a house or not. Do you think the market is stable or do you think that home prices will decrease by a lot?
Posted by: Courtney Gidts | June 13, 2006 12:59 PM