Beto to Run for President, but No One Can Stop Talking About His Depressed Dog

politics
March 13, 2019Mar 13, 2019

Failed senate candidate Beto O’Rourke is announcing his run for president. The Texas Democrat is slated to officially reveal his plans at 7:30 a.m. EST on Tuesday, according to Reuter’s sources.

O’Rourke claimed to be running a grassroots campaign to unseat Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) last year yet raised massive amounts of money from the Hollywood left. Cruz got close to 3 percent more of the votes than Beto in the closely watched race.

“I’m really proud of what El Paso did and what El Paso represents,” Beto told TV station KTSM. “It’s a big part of why I’m running. This city is the best example of this country at its best.”

“I’m just born to do this,” Vanity Fair quoted him as saying in a cover story teased by a giant front-page photo of the Texan. The fawning piece included photographs of Beto and his family taken by famed photographer Annie Leibovitz.

It was supposed to be a glorious moment for Beto, who had failed embarrassingly against Cruz but was ready for a comeback. With Facebook down most of the day on Wednesday, Twitter exploded with the news.

Except many Twitter users were not chatting excitedly about Beto’s chances against a crowded Democrat field and President Trump. They were commenting on how sad Beto’s dog looks in all the photos.

And then someone, of course, created a Twitter profile for the dog.

This is going to be one weird race.

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